Here's my offering to the 50 Shades of Grey mania - with a cheeky little Lila Whelan twist or two....
Challenge was to finish off an old idea half started/long forgotten.
Hope you're all having marvellous Valentine Day's - I'm guessing my card got lost in the post?
A couple of years ago I had an argument with my dad. Not a big one, but I was drunk and it got a bit more emotive than it would have done ordinarily. My pop is awesome, we get on ridiculously well, but there are some fundamental issues that we disagree on. And will probably always disagree on in a healthy, respectful way.
What happened a couple of years ago was that I found myself up against a calm, rational, well thought out, logical argument that just so happened to be in direct contrast to a fundamental belief I held close to my heart. It was such a fundamental belief that I believed it to be, well, logical. And, not only that, but something that everybody else would automatically follow as well as enlightened / well-educated / modern / liberal being. However, as you can probably imagine, basing your argument upon well-intentioned theoretical emotion does not stand up for long against sober logic.
Today we had to write from the point of view of someone whose views we differed from. I came up with this play. I feel I may have cheated a wee bit, but hopefully I met the brief. It was not a happy play to write, but oddly it is the longest I've managed so far in this challenge. Take from that what you will - and feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments box below.
"Put the knife down, Linda! Fine, I'll tell you what he did with the apple!"
And thus today's challenge opens - that's it, we were given the opening two lines and sent on our merry way...
I teetered on going down the comedy/sexual route, but instead I went for a slightly darker edge. Twas the knife that done it.
That's it for tonight - I'm pooped!
Screw you! Yeah, you heard me - screw you! I don't care what you think, I'm not writing this for you, I'm just throwing out some shapes, freestyling cos I'm a wild, free, rebel writer on the road to lyrical glory and I don't take no sh*t from nobod... Wait, what? Sorry. I should probably explain.
'Free form' was the concept for today's play - with specific instructions not to worry about the audience, director, actors or readers looking at the play might think.
I probably could have gone wilder in a post-post-modern, Sarah-Kane-stylee, 'there is no spoon' vibey, no character no linear narrative no stage no audience no rhyme no reason kinda way. But I didn't. I wrote about a first date. Because, well, I'm dating at the moment. It's fun and it's awkward and it's confusing and it's thrilling and it's weird - like, have you ever actually considered how strange and fundamentally bizarre it is to meet up with someone you don't know, have no context for - no friends/colleagues/school/uni/family connections to vouch for them - and then spend a couple of hours eating food and making chit chat with that person? It's crazy!
But oh my goodness isn't it wonderful...
Oh, and if you haven't seen Parks and Recreations yet, go watch immediately. Aubrey Plaza (in the image for this week) plays April Ludgate and she's awesome. As is Amy Peohler. And Aziz Ansair, and Nick Offerman. Oh! And Chris Pratt. And Adam Scott, Rob Lowe, Rashida Jones and Gary/Gerry/Jim O'Heir. Just go watch it, you'll love it. Think it's on Netflix - tell them I sent you, I might get free stuff.
Jeepers creepers, this was a tough one! After a week of relatively smooth conjuring, today's assignment stumped me. Completely. I resorted to asking my sister for help on the topic and, after she'd made herself laugh silly at her own 'genius' suggestions, I was no better off whatsoever (thanks Lou).
Why so stumped you ask? I'll tell you - today's challenge was to write about something YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT.
I'll be the first to admit, there's lots and lots I don't know about but for some reason when trying to actually pick a topic/theme/genre/subject I could only think of things I did know about. Hmm. Not only that, for bonus points today we had to include as many characters as possible. I think I made it to seven. And they are perhaps not the most rounded/3D/developed/non-stereotypical personages they deserve to be...
So, if you haven't guessed by now (or read the post title) - what does a writer/actor/artistic director know nothing about? BIG BUSINESS.
Forgive me - tonight's offering is not my best. I'm gonna blame it on the fact it's a Friday and I fell asleep on the train heading up north instead of doing work like a good writer would've done.
Big apologies to everyone and anyone who does actually work in the corporate world - oh, and give my love to Judith.
P.s Googling for 'business' stock images is, quite frankly, bizarre. Y'all in the corporate world do a lot of smiling and handshaking in black suits. I like the diversity reflected in my chosen pic. See - see, the woman on the left? Far left. She's wearing a camel coloured suit. WOW.
Today was the day of the bus strikes in London. Buses were running, but not as often as I really needed them to considering I was all the way up in Crouch End doing a bit of auditioning and acting this evening. I managed to get there fine no probs, but leaving at 8.30pm proved a bit trickier - no buses for half an hour. 'What to do, what to do,' methought, 'I know, I'll walk to the nearest tube! Google maps says its only 25mins, that's pretty much a 15 minute walk at my pace, it'll be a doddle!'
However, 15 mins was really 20 mins, and 20 mins in 1 degree is no fun. No fun at all. My fingers and my toes and my ears and my nose suffer terribly in low temperatures and all I kept thinking as I huffed through the streets of North London was 'I hate the cold, I hate the cold, I hate the cold...' which, fortuitously so it turned out, proved a rather useful jumping off point for this evenings contribution to the 28 Days Later challenge - to write about what you hate.
The other specification was to a) write loooong, lingering sentences, and b) write in a style you hate. Now I wouldn't say I hate writing monologues, but I do tend to avoid them. And if I'm totally honest (once my fingers had warmed up) I rather enjoyed having a crack at tonight's play. So much so that COLD has the honour of having my first named character in this series.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you: Gran'ma.
Just a heads up, she doesn't like the cold much either...
28 Plays Later